You thought you'd seen it all....but then along came this. Yet another way to sell surfing out to commercialism. Bad enough when our iconic brands get sold alongside preppie sh*te in major chain stores so that Jannie from the Vaal who doesn't even know what a wave looks like can walk around the Randburg Waterfront in his Taj boardies....that's bad....but this is worse.
Some muppet has decided we're all wannabe jetski riders in denial, and has gone and developed a lil motor that you can fix to the bottom of your board! I kid you not. Here's what the sales spiel says:"WaveJet is a new level of freedom. By empowering enthusiasts with light-weight propulsion for traditionally un-powered watercraft, WaveJet provides improved access, mobility and performance on the water."Anyone smell a bunch of surf-soul-sell-outs out to make a quick buck!!? Go get a real job for freaks sake, instead of whoring out our sport to make a living.
Basically they're trying to sell this thing as something that can do everything and probably brush your teeth as well. They reckon it's a wonderful addition to Short Boards: "With WaveJet, you get more out of the time you spend surfing because you can paddle out faster, expend less energy and catch more of the waves you try for."
Then they say you should fit em to SUP's too....imagine the chaos! Motorised Muppets on 10ft boards with paddles....someone give me a bazooka! These ou's should NOT be part of the gene-pool.
They even have a sudden responsibility attack...knowing that their toy is gonna stuff up line-up etiquette worse than a hoard of SUP's. They talk about Jetiquette (Oh, don't they just make you cringe!). It goes like this:
"With Power comes Responsibility. While this is an old saying that may seem tired to some, at WaveJet, it is a mantra to live by. WaveJet was created to enhance the way people interact with water, but NEVER to alienate the others with whom they share that space.
So next time you ride, make sure to keep in mind these rules of WaveJet-tiquette...so that you never come off as a WaveJerk!
So there we have it, happily admitting that what they trying to sell is gonna cause misery in the line-ups from Malibu to Noosa, they reckon if they just sprout out some pathetically scripted appeal that somehow that absolves them from the nightmare they're going to create should this moronic idea ever take off - and let's pray it doesn't!
I'm sure you could have a jol on one on flat days, or skooting around the canals at St Francis, or up the Sundays river, but to think that kak like this should be used on a board as part of the wave-catching/riding process.....hell no.
Summer's here. Which means lifeguards are back on duty and there's plenty peeps paddling and swimming about. It also means the start of the Black Ball season at Humewood. Black Ball? What it means is when the lifey's raise the Black Ball flag, the surfers have to get out the water. So.....
Flag up = no surfing.
No flag = surfing allowed.
Pretty freaking simple ou's, it ain't rocket science. Let's remember that they don't have to actually allow us to surf Hummies at all as there is actually a bylaw that states no surfing there. So it's just through the beach manager being cool and wanting to try accommodate all water users that we get cut some slack and are allowed there provided peeps aren't swimming.
So let's not abuse the privilege. The flag goes up, get out the water. As much of an annoyance as it is. Cos if we don't, chances are they might just boot us for good. Uncool.
Half the time the peeps just paddle in the shallows for a few minutes and then get out, so hang about on the beach for a bit til they bail, then you'll be able to get back in the water again when the lifey's drop the flag.
Much as we might think it sucks to get called out when some Vaalie is paddling about shin deep halfway down the beach, suck it up and go in. Rather surf with some restrictions than no surf at all.
Let's hold thumbs the east's start pushing some sand back against the pylons....
PS. The flags haven't actually arrived yet, so for the moment you're gonna just have to listen to the lifey's - when they start whistling like nuts and waving at you....um, that means get in!
UPDATE: Tony came up with a good idea, and I spoke to the beach manager about it - know when they put up the flag they're going to give a short blast on the siren too - so when you hear that you know it's time to get out. Tony rightly pointed out that half the time they could be whistling at bathers etc, and then we aren't always watching the beach all the time to notice the flag going up either.
Eish, these ou's give surfers a bad name. Some muppets decided it'd be clever to try smuggle in their coke stash inside their surfboards. Unlucky for them the Spanish authorities got wind of it and were waiting for em to collect their valuable cargo...and then went at their boards with chainsaws (check the video).
Each board had about 5-6kg's of highly pure cocaine stuffed inside, with a total of 51kg's being seized.
Must say, looking at those boards I reckon some savvy customs agent was a surfer, took one look at those things, and went no ways those are ou's are going to be surfing those pieces of sh*te...I smell a rat!!
Mind you, reckon if they did surf those things they woulda pulled some pretty "high" airs floating on 5k's of coke.
Just spotted someone pointing out that todays’ the 11th of the 11th 2011. So a quick webcrawl revealed the following:
11.11.11 is special because there is no other date that consists of all the same number. The day comes around once every 100 years, meaning today is the only time many people will be alive to experience the unique date.
Some websites are predicting the date 11.11.11 marks the end of the world because the comet Elenin, Earth, Venus and Mercury are expected to align. Sigh, the world would end just about every day if we listened to these muppets. My best was reading a blurb from some nutters that said today was a cosmic transport portal date – so there we go, you wanna head out into the galaxies, best you grab your ride today then! Wonder what these ou’s smoke…..
The numerology ou’s are having a field day too, check this out:
(2 digits) 11 x 11 = 121
(6 digits) 111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
(9 digits) 111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321
11.11.11 marks the 93rd anniversary of Armistice Day. Armistice Day was the last day of WWI. It is observed with one minute of silence at 11am.
Fighting when an armistice, or temporary cessation of hostilities, between the Allied nations and Germany went into effect on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month.
For that reason, November 11, 1918, is generally regarded as the end of “the war to end all wars.”
The number 11.11.11 is a classic example of apophenia, the human urge to see patterns in essentially random events.
So there we have it, your dose of randomness for the day…
November 5th - Guy Fawkes night. A lekker excuse to literally set your money on fire for a coupla seconds entertainment. Money well spent I say. Pity the wind got in on the act, and snuffed out plenty of the skyward missiles before they could explode into techni-colour brilliance. Only the strong survived.
Noticed some decent sized sets rolling through at the Pier amdist the festivities. Anyone for night surfing?